Teaching Kids Basic Manners with God at the Center of our Hearts
RAISING CHILDREN
9/8/2024
As parents, one of our greatest responsibilities is to guide our children as they grow into respectful, kind-hearted adults. Teaching basic manners is more than just preparing them for social situations; it’s about shaping their character and helping them become loving, compassionate people who reflect God’s heart. When we root our teachings in the values of Christ, we give our children the foundation to live with grace, humility, and kindness towards others.
With two preteens of my own — a 12-year-old daughter and a 10-year-old son — I know firsthand how essential it is to keep God at the center of our parenting journey. Every lesson we teach, including good manners, can reflect biblical principles that build strong, moral character. Manners, at their core, are about respect, love, and thoughtfulness — qualities that align perfectly with God’s call for us to love one another.
Here are some key biblical values that can guide us as we teach our children basic manners and kindness:
Philippians 2:3 — “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
Ephesians 4:32 — “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Matthew 7:12 — “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.”
When we instill good manners with these values in mind, we prepare our children to live lives that honor God and serve others.
The Importance of Manners in a Faith-Centered Life
In a world where respect and kindness can sometimes seem to take a backseat, it’s even more important that we teach our kids the significance of manners. Manners are not just about saying “please” and “thank you” but are about showing love and respect to everyone we meet, just as Jesus would. When our children learn to interact with others in a way that reflects God’s love, they become a shining light in a world that needs grace and kindness.
As parents, we have the opportunity to teach our kids that being polite, considerate, and kind isn’t just something we do to look good; it’s how we live out our faith and treat others with the love of Christ. By keeping God at the center of their hearts, they will understand that their actions should reflect His love in every interaction.
Top 10 Manners We Should Be Teaching Our Children
Below are the 10 top manners that we, as Christian parents, should be teaching our children. These aren’t just about social etiquette — they’re about living a life that reflects God’s love, humility, and grace.
Say “Please” and “Thank You”
These simple words show appreciation and respect for others. Philippians 4:6 encourages us to bring everything before God with thanksgiving — this includes being thankful to others.
Respect Others’ Opinions
Even if they disagree, teach your children to listen respectfully and value others’ perspectives. James 1:19 reminds us to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”
Greet Others with a Smile
A friendly greeting can brighten someone’s day. Smiling is a simple way to reflect God’s joy and hospitality. Proverbs 15:30 says, “A cheerful look brings joy to the heart.”
Use Kind Words
Words have the power to build up or tear down. Ephesians 4:29 reminds us to “not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up.”
Be Honest
Teach your children to speak the truth with love. Proverbs 12:22 says, “The Lord detests lying lips, but He delights in people who are trustworthy.”
Share and Be Generous
Sharing what we have, whether it’s toys, time, or talents, is a way to show God’s love to others. Hebrews 13:16 encourages us, “Do not forget to do good and to share with others.”
Respect Elders and Authority
Teach children to honor their parents, teachers, and other authority figures. Exodus 20:12 commands, “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
Apologize and Forgive
Mistakes happen. Teach your children to say “I’m sorry” and forgive others as Christ has forgiven us (Colossians 3:13).
Wait Your Turn
Patience is a virtue, and learning to wait for your turn shows respect for others. Psalm 37:7 tells us, “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.”
Help Others
Whether it’s opening a door or offering assistance, small acts of kindness show God’s love in action. Galatians 5:13 says, “Serve one another humbly in love.”
How to Instill Good Manners in Daily Life
Model the Behavior
Kids learn by watching us. As parents, we need to model good manners in our daily interactions so that our children will naturally follow suit.Praise Their Efforts
Positive reinforcement goes a long way. When your child uses good manners, praise their actions and encourage them to continue.
Practice Role-Playing
Create scenarios where your child can practice good manners. Whether it’s at the dinner table or meeting new people, role-playing can help them feel more confident.
Use Scripture as a Guide
Incorporate Bible verses and stories that highlight the importance of kindness, humility, and respect. This not only teaches them manners but also reinforces their understanding of God’s Word.
Be Consistent
Teaching manners is a daily practice. Be consistent with your expectations, and gently remind your child when they forget.
Final Thoughts
Raising children who embody good manners is more than just teaching them social rules; it’s about helping them reflect the heart of Christ in their everyday lives. As we teach our children to be kind, respectful, and considerate, we are guiding them toward a life that honors God and loves others well.
By keeping God at the center of their hearts, our kids can grow into adults who naturally live out the qualities that Jesus taught us — humility, love, and respect for others. Through both our words and our actions, we can help shape their hearts to become more like His.
Let’s take every opportunity to instill good manners, rooted in biblical principles, and help our children reflect God’s love in all they do.